UNAPOLOGETICALLY

Become More You

For years, I thought I was teaching business strategy.

Then I thought I was teaching alignment.

Today, I realize I’ve been teaching something much bigger.

I’ve been helping people to design the life that they want to live.

I’ve been helping people become more themselves.

Not a “better” version.
Not a perfect version.
Not someone else’s version.

The most authentic version of who they already are.

The people I work with aren’t looking for another motivational quote or another checklist.

They’re looking for permission. Sometimes all it takes is for someone else to tell you to go for it.

Permission to change.
Permission to grow.
Permission to leave what no longer fits.
Permission to dream bigger.
Permission to take up space.

I’ve learned that growth can’t happen if we don’t believe that we deserve to live our dreams.

Growth happens because we finally realize we are worth investing in.

That belief has shaped every major decision I’ve made.

Pillar 1: Alignment

Everything begins with alignment.

When your life no longer reflects your values, you feel it. You may not have the words yet, but your energy, relationships, work, and health begin telling the story.

One of the biggest shifts in my own life was recognizing that work-life balance wasn’t what I wanted.

I wanted alignment.

That realization eventually became my book, Harmony Aligned, and completely changed how I coach women today.

Alignment isn’t about doing less.

It’s about making decisions that reflect who you are becoming.

Pillar 2: Authenticity

Authenticity isn’t a branding strategy.

It’s a way of living.

For years I’ve built business and a life that reflects who I am: bilingual, entrepreneurial, community-centered, deeply connected to both Detroit and Mexico.

I’ve stopped trying to fit into one category.

I am a business strategist.
I am an educator.
I am an author.
I am a professional speaker.
I am an entrepreneur.
I am a nonprofit leader.
I am a coach.

The more I embraced and integrated all of those identities instead of choosing just one, the more my work began attracting the right people.

Authenticity creates clarity, even when it looks confusing from the outside.

Pillar 3: Self-Trust

Sometimes self-trust looks much smaller than people expect.

After my separation from Paco, I switched sides of the bed.

There wasn’t some profound reason.

I just did.

Years later I realized I had never switched back.

That tiny decision reminded me of something much bigger.

Life is rebuilt one small choice at a time.

Self-trust isn’t always dramatic.

Sometimes it’s simply allowing yourself to choose differently without needing to justify it.

Pillar 4: Courage

Courage isn’t the absence of fear.

It’s action before certainty.

I’ve built, failed and rebuilt my business. I created something that never existed.

I’ve hired and led teams.

I’ve started over more than once.

I’ve applied for opportunities that scared me, including TEDx. (Fingers still crossed!)

I’ve chosen to build a life between two countries because it reflects the life I want—not necessarily the easier one.

Every one of those decisions required courage long before confidence arrived.

Confidence follows courage.

Not the other way around.

Pillar 5: Growth

Growth is a lifelong decision.

I’ve failed.

I’ve pivoted.

I’ve started over.

I’ve continuously launched new projects, programs & platforms. I have closed chapters that no longer fit, written a book, raised my coaching prices when I finally recognized the value I bring, and continued learning every step of the way.

None of those decisions came from believing I wasn’t enough.

They came from believing I was worth investing in.

Growth is an act of self-respect.

Pillar 6: Joy

Joy isn’t something we earn after success.

It’s something we create along the way.

You’ll find me dancing.

Swimming in the ocean.

Traveling.

Laughing with friends.

Speaking on stage.

Singing.

Exploring new places.

Those aren’t distractions from my purpose.

They are expressions of it.

The fullest version of ourselves isn’t found only at work.

It’s found in the moments when we feel completely alive.

That is the life I’m choosing to build.

And that’s the life I want to help other women build, too.

Because becoming more yourself may be the bravest thing you’ll ever do.

Seek Harmony: Work-Life Balance Doesn’t Exist!

PG13 Title: Seek Harmony … f*** work-life balance, it doesn’t exist

By Bridget B. Espinosa, Puente Cultural Integration

 “Balance” is a misguided metaphor because it conveys the idea that we have to give up the prospect of success in one part of our lives in order to have it in another part—one or the other. ” Stewart Friedman

This perfectly explains why I reject this idea of “work life balance” and embrace the idea of HARMONY!

For years we have been told that we need to find a work-life balance. There is no such thing. This is a myth that does nothing but generate stress, and frustration. Having studied music in my youth, I have been drawn to the word harmony. Harmony is different from balance, it reflects the idea that there can be multiple layers working together in a pleasing way. There are many definitions of harmony, but the easiest to understand and achieve I found on yourdictionary.com “A combination of parts into a pleasing or orderly whole; congruity or agreement in feeling, action, ideas, interests, etc.; peaceable or friendly relations.”

We often use the word harmony to describe both the environment and our relationships – living in harmony is a common mantra. However, it is an uncommon description of our internal relationships with our responsibilities. Harmony is not difficult to achieve if you accept that different aspects of your life will be “singing the melody” while other factors provide the harmony. This metaphor shows that our family, work, social, health, and community lives can all live alongside one another – each one can take its turn providing the fundamental melody and our lives can be just as harmonious and beautiful regardless of which takes the lead. 

Harmony represents the world I want to live in: people of many backgrounds, races, ethnicities, genders, sexual orientation, sizes, professions, abilities, languages, all connected – different voices, religions, cultures, perspectives, opiniones, ideas – all living in harmony.

Important to the analogy is when even one note is played or sung wrong the whole chord sound awful! When even one part of your life is out of whack, your whole life can feel like it’s falling apart. But the reality is that the adjustment to find harmony again is usually just a small tweak. When one person in the choir or one instrument in the band is out of tune, you have two choices:

  1. In a rehearsal, you pause for a moment, address the issue and then start over making the correction.
  2. In a live performance (aka real life), you just keep going. Normally the issue will work itself out, but if the problem continues you need to figure out what is causing the harmonies to go array and make the changes necessary so that it won’t happen again.
Based on a thorough review of the literature we introduce an integrated conceptualization of
work-life balance involving two key dimensions: engagement in work life and nonwork life …
Work-life balance: An integrative review
MJ SirgyDJ Lee – Applied Research in Quality of Life, 2018 – Springer

So F%^& this whole idea of “Work-Life Balance”, toss it out the window and just seek harmony. 

I love listening to amazing vocal harmonies of diverse and talented singers. I sang for my entire youth and music continues to play an impactful role in my life. I searched for harmonies on youtube and found this incredible video. One of my former colleague’s sons is even featured in the best harmonies of 2021. This is soooo worth the time to take a listen and visualize these voices as the different elements of your life and how they can find harmony with one another.

Gifted Voices – Best Singing Videos (Best Harmonies 2021 – Pt.5)

#Giftedvoices #Singing #Voice

The word ‘Harmony’ has been following me over the last year!

I was asked to sit on the advisory board of Detroit Harmony, an initiative led by the Detroit Symphony Orchestra to provide musical instruments and experiences to every child in the City of Detroit.

My friend Laura LaBrie rebranded her Mysterious Mexico platforms to Maya Harmony. I have been following the Maya calendar, The Sacred Tzolk’in, trying to learn how to align my life to find the harmony that often eludes us.

Sacred Maya Calendar – The Path to Life

“The Sacred Tzolk’in is the story of  humankind wrapped in a calendar, reminding us daily of our journey from birth into the heart of the Divine. We cycle endlessly through the story, reliving each chapter every 20 days. And so, the wheel turns, its path reminding us of our own story. And if we come into alignment with it, we come into alignment with the Heart of Sky, the Great Spirit. And when we come into alignment, we find balance, we find center, our lives come into flow, things go well with us, and we find our place in the Universe. And when we find our place in the Universe, we discover our connection to the One Heart that is in all and is all. “

I love this question:

“And so, as the Maya greet each other, I ask you, “Bix a bel?  How is YOUR path?”

Another one of my passion projects is a weekly summer strolling music festival called Corktown Sounds. I have the honor to work with small businesses, musicians, and my team provides the content creation for this very cool event in Detroit. Shameless plug: We are hosting a Corktown Sounds Benefit Concert on February 4th. Tickets are on sale now!

I believe that we can have some really interesting discussions regarding harmony in our lives.
Join the discussion and give your experiences regarding how to embrace harmony in:

  • Relationships
  • Work
  • Business
  • Health
  • Travel
  • Finances
  • ??

What areas of your life need more harmony?

Here are other articles and blogs that embrace Harmony vs. Balance:

https://crossfitodyssey.com/sunday-story-balance-vs-harmony

Life ‘Balance’ Is Really More About Harmony, Forbes